Saturday, October 11, 2014

How to force yourself to wake up early

I have a problem, a really really big problem.
My bed seems to acquire some really strong magnetic force every morning, such that I can't seem to get out of bed at all.

I feel unmotivated to get up to run errands, I arrive late on dates and meetings, I lack the eagerness to wake up and start my day.
Nothing productive gets done, I get nagged at being late a lot, people dread having to meet me because I'm always making them wait.

This probably has quite a bit (actually a lot...) to do with being unable to fall asleep and thus resulting in surfing the net, watching dramas, stalking people's Instagram profiles until wee hours of the night.

But what happens if I only manage to fall asleep at 5am but I really really REALLY SERIOUSLY have to get up by 7am for an important meeting/ event but my body is so deprived of sleep I can't seem to get up?

Based on (too much) experience, I've written down my top few personal tips on how to get myself the fk out of bed, regardless of how tired I am for top priority urgent appointments.
For everything else, I pretty much just sleep through it.

1. Set an Alarm Clock
I'm not talking about your soothing little iPhone ringtones like "Uplift" or "Chimes" that will probably definitely put you into an even deeper slumber.
I'm talking about the twin bell alarm clocks that blare so bloody loudly and annoyingly
even if you don't get up to turn it off, your neighbour will get pissed off enough by it to barge into your house and wake you up to shut it up.

The idea is to forcefully jolt yourself awake because personally I think that's the most effective way to get your lazy ass out of bed.
Also, it helps to put your alarm clock a distance away from your bed so you will have to actually get out of bed to mute it.
This probably makes it a bit easier to drag yourself to the bathroom and wake yourself up further with a hot morning shower.

I bought my alarm from those neighbourhood shops... best $9 spent.
Sleep or no sleep, I'm like 90% on time/ early for all my meetings and events now.....for now :P
God I really hate this shit clock.

2. Bribe Yourself
New body foam, new hair conditioner that smells amazing, new comb, new clothes, new bag, new whatever you use/ need in the morning to get ready to get yourself excited.
More often than not, I find myself more willing to get up in the morning when I actually have something (that matters to me) to look forward to.
It might cost you a bit, which is why I said only use these tips for super urgent occasions :X

If it's your special indulgent coffee day of the week, remind yourself about it in the morning.
Caramel Latte Macchiato~ hurry & wash up and you can go drink it!! Plus you get to post it on IG!!

Or you can also prepare a delicious and hearty breakfast the night before so your morning will be a tad bit better.
Food is always the answer.
Sandwiches, breakfast wraps, pancakes, waffles, overnight oats, or even bacon mac & cheese for breakfast, whichever floats your boat, as long as it floats your boat in the direction of the toilet hahah

4. Get Pissed Off/ Bitch About Something
I don't know if this sounds weird to others, but when I'm hella angry or annoyed by something/ someone, it's IMPOSSIBLE for me to go to back bed no matter how tired I am.
If the situation calls for it, get annoyed by something and bitch tweet/ complain to someone about it,
it actually makes you more awake than ever. LOL!
Tap on these feelings to help yourself heartlessly walk away from the comforting warm embrace of your blanket.
You'll probably cool off in the toilet anyway, so no damage done~

If nothing pisses you off, set this photo of me on Halloween 2011 as your phone lock screen and let it say 'good morning' to you. That should do the trick.

5. Sleep Early
Getting sufficient rest will make getting out of bed the next day a lot less tiresome.
But you and I probably can't do this no matter how hard we try, which is why this post was written in the first place.
So let's just scratch point 5.

Side note, waking someone up by making them smell a stinky sock doesn't work because we can't smell when we're asleep.

Anyway, I hope these tips work for you night owls as much as they do for me!

But don't you just wish we could stop time when we're sleeping, so we can get as much shut eye as we want, and resume time only when we're ready to face the world?
Yup, me too.

Thank you for reading, love you all.

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